Spiritual-one: Blog on Spiritual Growth & Development

Toxic People - 5 Ways to Handle Them

By Chrissy Atley

Do you have toxic people around you that make you miserable? I used to have a lot of people around me who had negativitis, as I like to call it. Funny thing happened though, the more positive and happy I became, the more these "types" of people disappeared!

Here are some tips to help you deal with the negativitis and start attracting more positive people in your life.

Tip #1: Redirect Their Focus

If you find you are around a lot of people who are complaining try to change their focus. Instead of getting "sucked in" to their drama, ask them what they would like instead or if anything good came out of the situation. Hopefully, that will stop them from complaining and help them see the situation from a new perspective. If all else fails, simply excuse yourself from the conversation. Whatever you do, don't get caught up in their drama or you will likely find yourself becoming negative and even angry while the other person will probably feel better! If that happens, you have taken on their negative energy. Be careful, it's contagious if you aren't aware of it.

Tip #2: Conserve Your Own Energy

If you absolutely can't leave the situation, take time to conserve your own energy so that you don't take on the person's negativitis. Imagine yourself protected by a big white bubble filled with positive energy. You will let in positive energy, but not negative. This is actually quite liberating because you know no matter what you won't take on their "bad vibes". The person will likely move on once they see you are not reacting and getting caught up in their drama.

Tip #3: Stand up for You!

Above all else, start doing what makes you happy. If you don't feel good when you're around someone, stop being around them. Simply wish them well in your mind and move on to to people that make you feel good. If it's someone you have to spend time with, like a family member, limit how much time you spend with them and try the technique outlined in tip #2. You can also have a heart to heart conversation with this person explaining how you feel.

Tip #4: Do What You Love

When you follow your own dreams and are truly doing what you love, you will attract more and more positive and like minded people into your life. The "negative" people will start to fade away. If you're too overwhelmed with "life" right now, take baby steps. What is one thing that will make you happy this week? Is it going for a massage or a walk in nature, having dinner with someone you love or even having a hot bath with a glass of wine? When you start doing more and more that makes you happy, things around you will start shifting.

Tip #5: Be Thankful

Try to appreciate what you do have in your life right now. If you can't find anything, go back to basics, like being able to read this newsletter. When you are in a state of thankfulness you will be feeling much better and like tip #4, you will attract more and more to be thankful for. Can you make a list of 10 things / people you are grateful for having in your life right now?

"I know it seems hard sometimes, but remember one thing, through every dark night, there's a bright day after that. So no matter how hard it gets, keep your chest out, keep your head up and handle it."

- Tupac

Female entrepreneur Chrissy Atley publishes a FREE ezine weekly, entitled "Life Change Success" filled with hot tips on how to get out of your own way and start living your dreams now. Sign-up today at http://www.totalharmonycoaching.com

If you liked today's topic, visit http://www.totalharmonycoaching.com for FREE tips on how to set goals while using the law of attraction.

Everyday Spiritual Practice That Only Takes a Moment

By Nancy Binzen

The number of people who define themselves as spiritual rather than religious continues to grow steadily. Spirituality, though--at least on a day-to-day basis--can be challenging to maintain.

Unlike religion, spirituality has no organized structure to fall back on. In fact, one of its defining attributes is the emphasis on personal, intimate experience of the sacred without the filter of creed or dogma.

But without structure how does one develop and maintain such awareness quickly and easily when every day seems to be yet another giant "to-do" list? Ritual requires preparation; meditation takes time and a quiet place; sacred songs and chants need to be memorized.

There is one practice, though, that instantly connects us to what some call the Divine Spark and takes only a few moments.

This is the practice of gratitude.

Meister Eckhart, a 13th century Christian mystic, wrote, "If the only prayer one knows is 'thank you,' that is enough."

It's customary in many cultures and traditions to say or sing a blessing or prayer before a meal. Here are two variations on this simple act of thanksgiving. Both can be done extremely quickly, in any situation at any time.

One brings mindfulness back into what often becomes nothing more than a rote exercise. The other is for a group setting, where there may be many different belief systems--or none, that allows all guests to participate without feeling uncomfortable.

1. Connecting to Source

Any time before eating or drinking, whether you're sitting down to a complete meal or just having a snack, take a moment to reflect on all that is nourishing you in that instant.

For example, if you're about to eat an apple, say thank you to the tree. If potato chips, to the potato plant in the field. If a coffee latte, thank the coffee bush, the country in which it grew, and the cow (or soybean plant) that provided the milk. If you wish, for another moment send thanks to all the people--farmers, ranchers, field hands, truckers, store owners and farmers' markets--that brought this food to your table.

This practice literally takes only a few seconds to help you remember your connection to all living things, a key element in spiritual practice.

2. Making a Spirit Plate

At a community potluck after all guests have served themselves but before anyone begins eating, ask everyone in turn to put a teaspoon-size serving of anything on their plate on a communal plate. Each spoonful is accompanied by a moment of silent gratitude--expressed internally in whatever words or form are natural for the person making the offering.

After everyone has contributed, dispose of these small food offerings in a mindful way. If the potluck is outside or there is easy access to a backyard, bury the food or, if appropriate, leave it for wild animals. If this isn't possible, put the food in a small bag and give it to someone at the party who composts. Or add all of it to a soup stock.

Regardless of what you do with the food, the important thing is that you dispose of it respectfully, honoring the many and varied expressions of gratitude it contains.

Copyright 2009-Stories from the Heart

Nancy Binzen is a Certified Storyteller and has a Doctor of Ministry in Wisdom Studies. She offers in-person workshops and private coaching in story-shaping and ritual; video production for people who want to preserve and pass on a personal legacy; and a variety of story tools, products and services for parents, teachers, healers and self-discovery on her website at http://www.stories-from-the-heart.com

Becoming Radiant

By Joseph Schwartzman

These are subjects that come from your heart. When you open your heart to love, you open yourself to the world. Look inside yourself and see the love that is there. You may find limitations. We are here to help you work through them. Settle back and relax. Let yourself ease into relaxation. Let your body totally let go until there is nothing there at all, until there is nobody there, just a sense of peace. Look inside yourself and see if you can find hope. We want to find the hope inside you. Can you find what you're looking for in life? When you find what you're looking for, does it make you happy? Sometimes you find what you had hoped for, and then realize it wasn't what you wanted. Then you are disappointed with yourself, and inside of yourself is an emptiness, a feeling that you looked and didn't find, a sense of failure. Then you find that hope has become the enemy, and that you no longer believe in having things you had hoped for. You begin to reject what you want, because you think it won't be any good when you find it. Self-respect is important for loving yourself. When your hopes seem pointless, your own existence may seem of no use.

The key is to understand the meaning of hope. Become aware of your hopes; identify where they come from, and choose a higher purpose. When you choose from your lower levels - from your ego, for instance - you choose something that will not work out for you, and your self-image becomes tied up in the disappointment you feel when your hopes and dreams don't work out the way you wished. When you aspire to something, you must aspire to something that comes from the highest levels. You must ask yourself the meaning of what you're looking for, identify it, see if it comes from above. You must search within yourself, not look elsewhere for the answers or depend on the opinions of others. You must learn to identify the inspirational level. By learning to look upward, you will find real answers to all of your questions; and when you find these real answers, your hopes and dreams are worthwhile.

Now think of something you hope for. If this thing were in your life, would your feeling toward yourself improve? Would you feel better about yourself? In what way would having it improve your self-image?

Now we ask you to consider something else. When you ask yourself, "How much love do I have in myself?" what happens in your mind, what do you see happening? Do you feel a conflict that prevents you from feeling love? We want you to turn your attention to this, give some real attention to this idea, because it is very important for you to love yourself, to increase the love that dwells within you. It is as if you have a body of love as well as a body of flesh. There is joy inside you, too, and this comes out of the love you give to others. First you must draw love to you and fill yourself with it. The universe will fill you up the moment you ask it to. Love is there, waiting for you to call it in. The substance of your being is made of this love, so when you call it to you you're calling your own substance into life. Through the love within you, you create life where there may not have been life before. This love is a part of you; when you deny yourself this love, you deny the life that dwells inside you. Therefore let yourself flow outward into other dimensions via the carrier, the energy flow, which is this love.

Turn your attention to your heart, feel love filling your heart and opening it up. The love inside you comes directly from your soul - here is where your love meets the world. Your connection to the world through love is here in your heart. Have self-respect through loving yourself and it will flow outward from you; it will radiate from you, and you will give it to the world. Honesty and freedom will be yours, and love and warmth and affection on the highest level will fill all aspects of your being.

When you are in this state of love, all the heavenly beings are at your disposal; all of the highest heaven supports you. For it is the will of God that love will fill your heart, and surround you and others. Instead of being tied to the lower elements, you will align yourself with the highest calling of heaven. You will feel yourself being permeated by the love that comes to meet you, to join you. The energy around you will be filled with the force of this love, and you will respect yourself more now, because you've let this in, because you've let love fill you.

Go now, and take this with you into the world. Let this love be part of every aspect of your life.

We, the Carriers of Light, say to you: Let yourself rest and find joy and happiness in all that you do.

In a Nutshell Look inside your heart and feel the love within you. Are you disappointed by anything that you had hoped for? Your radiance begins with hoping for things that come from your higher purpose, with loving and respecting yourself. Let yourself hope for something that you imagine would come from the highest levels. Notice how this hope elevates you. Do you restrict the amount of love you can receive? Allow the universe to send you love. You are made of love, so let it fill your heart. When your heart is full, let this love flow outward from you. You are radiating love as the sun radiates heat and light. Notice how much more you can respect yourself when you are radiating love.

Joseph Schwartzman

http://www.channeling-spirit-guides.com